I have been retired about a year now, and what a wonderful time it has been. I am just getting passed the feeling of guilt, mixed with a vague feeling of getting away with 'playing hooky'. I play a lot of golf and tennis, both of which I started playing in high school.
I recently had a confrontation with an old, very competitive friend on the tennis court. It bothered me a lot, and caused me to do some soul-searching. Competition has always been a big part of my life. I think it partially has to do with growing up with 8 brothers. The simple act of eating is a lesson in survival and competition. But far more subtle is the emotional competition of finding one's place in the pecking order, in both the family and social structures. Being rather small, I had to regularly do battle with my next-youngest brother for my rightful place. He was always as big or bigger than myself. I took an aggressive approach and waged a head game with him, teasing him mercilessly. Eventually we would fight and I would always dig deep to make sure I ended up on top.
Competition plays a major part in our society. Just consider all of the venues in which 'winning' is critical. There is obviously the economic game, the social game, the workforce game, the political game, the family game, and the all-important romantic relationship game. These just are the obvious low-hanging fruit. I am told this competitive nature is not necessarily common to all cultures around the world, but IS a major characteristic of the American spirit, and not surprisingly, it seems to have served us well.
But let's take a closer look? The world, our country, and our communities are rife with unhealthy competition. First, let me define 'unhealthy' as being any hint of causing division between people. In its extreme form there is HATE. Currently there is a very hotly-contested political campaign for president, which seems to be pitting the Haves versus the Have Nots.
Then, on a seemingly lighter note, there are several Bay Area sports teams that are competing for championships right now. Do you want to see a very visible showing of the competition bringing out the worst in people? Watch a bar full of Warriors fans during a contested Championship game, or San Jose Sharks fans, or a Giants versus Dodgers game. Sports events that contain a large number of fans from both teams together can erupt in disaster. And what is really at stake for any of the individuals lives (barring a large wagers)? In other words, what motivates us to behave like this? Competition, seemingly just for its own sake.
I am sure there are many studies that look at the psychological and sociological implications of competition. But to view it in a more practical sense, what if we (I) were to view all people as actually being on the same team. We are ALL in this for the larger common good. One big, happy family. And what if I were to find myself across the tennis net with someone who wants to beat my ass? That would be a lesson in tolerance and patience.