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In the Spring of 2016, I was having a beer with my older brother Mike in the kitchen of his condo in Surprise Az. I told him that Glenn (our #4 brother) had attended Giants Fantasy Camp in January of that year. I still had not talked with Glenn about it at that point, so we decided to give him a call. Glenn took a breath, then talked for at least 30 minutes, about what an awesome time he had there: the baseball (obviously) but also the coaching and teaching, and, of course, spending a fortune hanging out at the bar with old Giant's legends.
In August of that same that year, I met up with Glenn and Mom over dinner in Millbrae, and asked him some specific question about Fantasy Camp. Again, he went on, and on, and on. After about 20 minutes, I was looking to change the channel a bit, so I finally interrupted him to ask, "Would you do it again?"
Without hesitation, he answered, "In a heartbeat with any one of my brothers".
And with that answer, I started to give it some serious thought.
So in March 2017, I went on the Giants Fantasy Camp website, but it had not yet been updated for the 2018 session. I called the contact number and left a voice mail. Bill Laskey (who runs the camp) returned my call with lots of relevant information. Although the website explicitly states, NO GROUPS - ONLY sole entrants, he assured me that, as long as we are not a 'ringer' team', all of the Farrell brothers would be welcome, and that we could all play on the same team. I later assured him that we would be one of the 'older' teams.
I sent an email to my nine siblings to see who might be interested. After a couple of negative email responses, and mostly silence except for Glenn, who was ready to start packing, I made a couple of personal phone calls. Eventually, the following FIVE of us would be going the following January, 8 months after sending the email. In order, Mike (65), Me (63), Glenn (the veteran - 61), Dennis (60), and Rick (57). Our average age at the event would be 61. On our jerseys, we would have 'Farrell' and our numbers, which would be our position in the Farrell pecking order. See the lineup here.
In the following months, we got together in a group SKYPE meeting every month or so, just to converse, ask questions, encourage one another to get in baseball shape, and drink (literally) in one another's virtual company. Any excuse for a party.
Somewhere in those 8 months, we decided to try to get as many of our other siblings to attend the Scottsdale event in January for a reunion of sorts. To attempt to sweeten the deal for our siblings, I bought each of them their own Giants 'visiting' (black) jersey with their birth number to match the jerseys we would be getting. This jersey may have become enough of an incentive to get #9 there.
Opening ceremonies would be Sunday, January 15, 2018 at 7 pm.
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| Bill
Laskey, MC for the camp, with the mic. Coaches line the front
of the room. Jeffrey 'HacMan' Leonard closest on right. See his autograph. |
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| Will "The Thrill' Clark was introduced and proceeded to tell a few hilarious stories, which I am sure, he has told about a million times before. |
The bulk of the next two hours was spent with everyone introducing themselves. Starting with the rookies, we were to standup, give our name, where we are from, and say who our favorite Giant of all time is. Most Rookies were hitting the easy picks: Mays, McCovey, Marichal, Cepeda, Bonds (Sr. or Jr.).
As the rookies took turns and the line going back and forth down aisles, I noticed that Mike and myself were bookends of the four Farrell Rookies. Either Mike or myself would be the first to introduce themselves as 1 of 5 brothers, a VERY rare, if not completely unique experience for the Giants Fantasy Camps. Eventually, I breathed a sigh of relief when I realized that Mike would be the first of us to go. He stood and did a very nice job of explaining, through a room full of 'oohs' and 'aahs', how we all came to be there.
Then Ricky stood up. He barely got his name out, when he was rudely interrupted by Bill Laskey. "Is that a Red Sox hat?", he asked. "What possessed you to wear a Red Sox hat to a Giants Fantasy Camp?".
Through a room full of boos, Ricky tried to explain that this beat-up rag of a hat had sentimental value as a gift from his son many years ago. No one heard except us.
Eventually, Dennis got up and recovered some modicum of dignity. He gave his name and offered Barry as his favorite player, remembering that he very graciously walked across the Scottsdale stadium parking lot once to give Mom an autograph. Dennis received a spattering of polite applause.
It was my turn, so I stood and said my name and that I was the second in the Farrell line up. None of the ex-Giants in the front of the room was my favorite, and I didn't want to pick one of the old standbys, so I said that my favorite Giant was 'Timmy'. I thought that Laskey might find this a curious choice and ask, "Why Timmy?" I would then respond, "The typical pro baseball player is either tall, or muscular, or both. But Timmy is neither, roughly my size and weight. He is like the modern day 'David' hurling at the 'Goliaths' of the day and he enjoyed great success doing so.
But in reality, Bill retorts, "Timmy who?"
Shocked, I say, "Yeah, right? You don't even need to use his last name"
He asks again, "No really, Timmy who?"
Now I am stunned! "You don't know who Timmy is?"
Then the clown with the microphone says, "I know who Timmy is. I just want to see if you do".
Silence in the room. "Lincecum," I mutter, and quietly sat down.
Through this episode and throughout the week, I would learn one of the basic tenets of celebrities: they are ALL human and can be just as insecure and awkward as the rest of us.
After the ceremonies, we all went up to Glenn and Ricky's room for drinks and laughs. A couple of us later agreed that these late-evening sessions would be one of the highlights of the trip. These guys are MY favorite Giants! (Too corny?) |
| Another
evening of, "Can you believe we're doing this?" while Glenn feeds
us fun facts. |
6:30 am - Breakfast buffet, served just off the hotel bar area from 6 am - 8 am. Players and coaches gathered together, telling stories of the night (or day) before. Then back up to the hotel room to bring June coffee, then a morning bathroom visit, then some light stretching.
7 am to 8 am - Vans shuttled players and coaches to the stadium, 5 minutes away. Glenn would eventually drive us to the stadium, then to Indian School when necessary. Much nicer!
9 am - Kangaroo Court in the locker room, with the honorable Jeffrey 'HacMan' Leonard presiding. This fast-paced half-hour had Neil, the court clerk, read charges, then the defendant would offer some weak defense. HacMan then decided on a monetary sentence using some creative formula (how much is the hat worth now?). The fine was usually between $5 to $50.
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| Kangaroo
Court |
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| Glenn was brought up the first morning on charges of not preventing his rookie brother Ricky from wearing the Red Sox hat to opening ceremonies. Glenn did his best, but was tapped for $6 to the bat boy fund. |
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| Vida
Blue being brought up on charges of not using the 'Beeno'
that was given to him by a veteran player. Legend has it, he ultimately cleared the room with one of his trademark 'smellers'. See his autograph. |
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| Mike
Lawrence, our catcher for this game, was brought up on charges of
molesting a female veteran (Mona) for several minutes while
'applying the tag' during a play at home plate. Mike's defense:
"She kept wiggling toward home plate and the umpire never made a
call." She testified (in good humor), "No means NO, Mike! You are a MONSTER". |
BTW: I have a new-found appreciation for 'Locker room language'. Professional ball players probably take a one-day seminar on how to squeeze as many f-bombs into a sentence as possible. Not all players and campers in the locker room use this language, but the exceptions are few. I admit that I enjoyed letting them fly in the locker room. Good F---ing fun!
Monday - Photos in cream jerseys. We all got our pics taken with the coaches, then individually with Will, then all of the Farrell's with Will. We offered to hold him sprawled 'hot dog on a bun' style, but thankfully he declined.
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| Will
'the Thrill' Clark and the Farrell Brothers. See his autograph. |
At Indian School Park, the other venue for games, roughly 5 miles from the stadium, the rookies separated from the veterans for the morning session. We circled for a group stretch session, then broke into two groups. One took ground balls led by Scarsone and Garrelts. Balls were taken at 2nd and thrown to first base. The other groups took them from 3rd to home. I was in with Mike as he had trouble getting down to field ground balls. Then we all took balls at short and threw to Will Clark at first. Ricky had a hard time reaching first base. Will made good short hops on the first two, but was groaning about the crappy throws coming up 5 ft short. Finally on the third, he took off his glove and threw it at the ball going by, letting a long string of expletives fly. Hilarious!
Then, fly balls were hit to our group, led by Hack and Tiny Felder. While Hack is funny in an intimidating manner, Tiny is a very approachable, clean and fun-loving guy. I will NEVER forget watching Tiny out on the field early in the morning, holding an audience of maybe six of us, including Rich Murray, go on and on about his showmanship. "I am an entertainer!" he sang in his high-pitched 'Chris Rock', rapid fire voice, while dancing a pop-move shake thingy.
After morning fielding, we took a break for sandwiches at the park, then picked up again for live batting. We were to take 3 sets of 5 swings. The Farrell rookies, being in the first group, put on a pretty good show with the bats. But it was followed by a LONG afternoon of shagging balls. Vida filled in by hitting ground balls to 2nd base until he got tired. He is 68 after all.
After tryouts, we all shuttled back to the stadium. While the coaches did their draft, Ricky went to the trainer room, even though he never copped to being sore. Dennis, Glenn, and Mike announced they were going to Dick's to buy Mike a new pair of shorts. I was at my locker when some dude came up to me and said the Farrell brothers were drafted to Scott Garrelt's team. I followed him to the room and the entire team was gathered around a table. I got to explain where the rest of the brothers were. Some big, old, red-faced friendly guy was blabbering about how our philosophy was going to be about having fun. He said the Farrell brothers were always laughing and enjoying themselves on the field, so that's why he picked us. "Our team name?" someone asked. And a second later, someone hollared, "Feral KATS!" All agreed and meeting adjourned. Out of the meeting, I asked one of our teammates who the big, red-faced guy was? He said, '"That's Mark Davis, 1989 Cy Young award winner".
We were to assemble at Indian School field tomorrow morning for our team workout.
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| The Feral Cats Back row (L to R): Rick, Scott Garrelts , Mark Davis, Dave Lemke, Andy ('Ed Lee'), Mike L., Mike F.,Tyson Lemke. Front row: Steve, Me, Glenn, Scott, Thomas, Al, Dennis |
Monday evening, the rookies gathered separately from the veterans. We quickly learned why. In groups of 5, we were led into a room with a pile of dresses on a table. We were to pick one, put it on over our clothes, and as a group decide whether we wanted to sing one of the songs selected for us, or answer a multiple choice baseball trivia question. Some genius in our group grabbed 'Sweet Caroline'.
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| The
Farrell Rookies in their selected dresses. Notice the 'rookie beads' around our necks. The rookies were given them at checkin and told to NOT remove them until told to do so. |
At Salty Senorita, the veterans and other casual patrons were in a crowed restaurant. Some celebrities shy away from attention, others seek attention. In front of the entire restaurant, Steve Kline lightly and subtlety dropped his phone, then dropped his pants, and turned around and bent over to pick it up. Not pretty, but very funny.
Just before our performance, I made a big mistake by saying to the group, "just sing loud". We were booed off the stage in about 20 painful seconds. Another group was threatened with spray-painting their hair orange after missing their first question on a trick. They narrowly avoided this fate, although I seriously doubt anyone has ever had that happen in fantasy camp history. The rest of the evening was spent with lots of eating and drinking. We were no longer rookies and we could loose the beads.
Tuesday morning - At 8 am at the stadium, the pitchers shown below held a pitching clinic. This include lots of talk about various favorite pitches, how they threw them, and when.
Kirt Manwaring concurrently held a catching clinic. I later told Kurt that I caught four innings on Tuesday morning, and my quads were sore for 2 days. He said, "Yeah, it's not easy, huh? More people should pick me as their favorite Giant!" See his autograph.
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| In the right-field bullpen. From left: Jim Gott, Kirt Manwaring (catcher), Mark Davis, Scott Garrelts (see his autograph) |
Then we all loaded into a van for a workout with our team at Indian School. We all circled up and introduced ourselves. I offered 'Gary, but I also respond to '#2'. Several other alternatives were offered for me, including 'Duece'. I growled, "Don't call me Duece!" I might as well have said, 'please, everybody call me Duece!"
Scotty pitched BP in a cage for at least an hour. Some of us pitched while Mark gave tips.
The next three games (Tuesday and Wednesday) would be preparing for the tournament which starts with games on Thursday, Friday, and championship games on Saturday.
The coaches said they didn't want to manage who plays when and what positions. So it was really like a game of musical chairs, with the chairs being positions on the field, except for pitcher and catcher. With 13 players, 4 people had to sit every inning. If you were on the bases when the last out was made and had to run back to the dugout to get your glove, you were probably going to sit that inning. In fact, if you were caught by surprise when the last out was made, you were probably going to be in the outfield. But by the end of the week, just the opposite was true. With Tyson being out permanently for the last 4 games or so, there were ONLY 3 seats on the bench. You almost had to plead your case every inning if you wanted one of those 3 seats.
The batting order was posted and would remain the same for the entire week. The order would pick up for the following game where the last game left off. Everyone would get the same number of at-bats.
Fans in attendance: June, Gus and Maria, Dan and George, Rich. GO Feral CATS!
In a team meeting just before the game, the coaches confirmed who would pitch during the next three games. Just before breaking for the dugout, I happened to ask, 'what about catching?' We all looked at each other as no one volunteered. I said I did it once for about 20 minutes, so I got the job. Scott May had really cool catching gear that he volunteered, so I strapped it on.
The youngest member of our team, Tyson (32), led us off with a single up the middle, followed by the same from me. And it was off to the races from there. It was a scoring-fest as all pitchers struggled to find the strike zone. Ricky finally got the nod later in the game, and although he pitched better than the previous ones, he still struggled to find the strike zone. The score was close, and we were almost at the 2 hr. time limit, so Mark made a trip to the mound. I also jogged out.
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| Mark
Davis makes a trip to the mound. See his autograph (notice the 'you' that he quickly added after he was horrified that he left it out. Lots of laughs ensued!) |
Mark said to Ricky, if he gets out of this inning with no more runs, he would buy Ricky any drink of his choice. However, if he didn't, then Ricky would buy Mark an order of ribs (at Don N Charlies! ouch!). Ricky agreed, then gave up two more runs that inning before making the final out.
We grabbed the bats and quickly scored three runs. While I was at the plate, Dave Lemke made a strange attempt to steal third and was easily thrown out, followed by his son Tyson doing the same thing. I was so confused standing at the plate. From third base, Mark said that we needed to let the home team bat quickly or the game would end on a time limit. "So you want me to make an out?", I asked? "Yes!" he replied.
So on the next pitch I hit a weak come-backer to the pitcher to end the
inning. We took the field and they quickly got their first two batters on
base - not looking good. But to Ricky's credit, we magically got a double
play, then someone hit a bullet to short where Scott made a great play to
end the game. Feral Cats win 16-14! Good fun!!
Mike, with 3 hits, one of them a double, was awarded game MVP along with the autographed lineup card. I got very sore quad muscles from squatting behind the plate.
Tuesday Evening - Team Dinner. Andy, our team 'Ed Lee' (ex-SF mayor) look-alike, had arranged for all of us to have dinner at Don-N-Charlie's with Will Clark and Vida Blue. He called 'dibs' on sitting next to Will the Thrill, so at the Farrell end of the table, we had Mark Davis and Vida Blue. Vida entertained as only he could, with countless stories and good humor. The next day, I heard someone say that Vida had the flu, although in his defense, he sounded perfectly normal sitting next to me. A couple of days later, I began to feel lethargic, and by Sunday on our ride to Palm Springs, I was ready to die. In my sick hallucination, I made up a country song, "I got the Vida Blue Flu".
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| Dennis
and Glenn were across the table from Vida, safe from the crud. |
Fans in attendance: June. Gus and Maria and Dan and George took a drive to Sedona. Sandra and Oscar were due to arrive that afternoon.
Dennis pitched a couple of innings toward the end of that game. He has a very relaxed and simple motion and pitched VERY well. He consistently threw strikes and it became a different game, allowing the fielders and hitters to enjoy themselves. He would go on to pitch again in the Friday morning game.
We lost that game, and all of the following games except the last game of the week on Friday.
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| Dennis
commanded the mound with a simple, fluid motion. |
Fans in attendance: June, Geoff and Sue, Joy (Sue's
sister) and her husband Rusty, Rich, and Randy.
This game featured an announcer with a good sense of humor. Everyone on our team was announced with the last name of Farrell. It went on for about four innings, with him sometimes adding a bonus 'Farrell' or two at the end. I had the special privilege of being announced as Gary 'Duece' Farrell.
I was starting pitcher and Ricky caught that entire game. I warmed up in the bullpen where I threw 20 or so pitches pretty hard. The very first pitch of the game was bunted. As I picked it up and threw him out easily, I said, 'Hey, you're not a girl!" I thought only girls were allowed to bunt. As it turns out, each team can have a man bunt only once in the game.
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| One
of the many highlights of the week for me - pitching to Ricky
(catching) and having Mike backing me up on 2nd base! |
The rest of the inning went so well that Scott said I won a second inning. The next inning was also easy, so I got a third inning. We gave up two runs in the third, one of them on my first walk with the bags loaded. My forearm was hurting by now, so I finished the third inning, having given up a 'duece'. Later in the trainers room I learned the muscle is called the 'Pronator Teres' muscle.
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| We
played against Rich
Aurilia and Gary Davenport's team. I don't think they had as
much fun as we did. See his autograph |
Ricky went on to hit for the mini-cycle: Triple, Double, Base hit. He was awarded the 'Player of the Game' autographed lineup card.
On Wednesday night, the extended Farrell clan, including Sandra and Oscar, met at Zipps restaurant for dinner and drinks.
Note: Sandra and Oscar had bought a gorgeous 24 ft. travel van just a month earlier. They planned to leave early that morning from San Diego, but had battery issues and were delayed. It was great seeing them that evening!
Fans in attendance: June, Gus and Maria, Dan and George, Sandra and Oscar. As it turns out, Sandra can be quite contentious with the umpire and we all got an earful at the plate.
I confirmed with Scott that Ricky was our starting pitcher, who replied, "It would have been you if your arm was healthy". That made me feel better. The coaches restarted the lineup at the top and told us where to play for the start of the game. He made some defensive changes in the third inning, but then seemed to forget about defensive changes until the fifth inning when someone asked if they could go back in. "Oh yeah," he said, "back to the original defense".
Their starting pitcher was notorious for his pick-off move. When anyone was on base, he would lift his left for a long while, keeping the runner in suspense wondering if he would throw home or to first. After Tyson, our first batter, was picked off after walking, our coaches debated the legality of this move with Joel Youngblood, their coach. I walked on the following at-bat, and didn't take a lead at all. As it turns out, he had trouble throwing strikes and was removed as pitcher in the second inning.
But they had a number of good pitchers and we struggled to throw strikes the entire game. I had my one and only strike-out that game on three pitches.
Fans in attendance: June, Gus and Maria, Dan and George, Sandra and Oscar were over the left field wall. Rich and Randy Howard were in a gateway close to the dugout.
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| Looks
like they were having a lot more fun than we were. |
Thursday night - After the game, Sandra and Oscar raced around the bases.
Anthony showed up right after the game. We immediately took pictures of
all of the siblings lined up in front of the Scottsdale stadium.
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We met at the hotel for drinks after the game.
 In one of his many hilarious stories, Mike 'Tiny' Felder tells about his fondness for the Strawberry Daquiri - NAKED!  |
| Glenn quietly disappeared and came back 10 minutes later with Tiny's favorite drink. Perfect! Then we all went to Salty Senorita for a family and friends dinner. |
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| Kevin
Mitchell with the Farrell Brothers. Kevin
had just arrived in camp and he was not aware of our situation. When we told him we were all brothers, he shouted 'No F-ingWay!' See his autograph. |
Fans in attendance: June, Gus and Maria, Dan and George, Sandra and Oscar, Anf, Randy.
Dennis pitched the ENTIRE game, and was awarded the 'Player of the Game' autographed line-up card. Yes, they hit the ball, and those of us who could still move, fielded the ball.
By this time, I was hobbling around and sick of baseball. I envied Tyson who decided to take the rest of the week off. We went back to the stadium for lunch and I got in line at the trainers room. This young kid lifted and twisted my legs and decided my pain is mainly from a strained left hip flexor. He offered to wrap it so that I could play the last game. Ten minutes later, I wandered into the locker room and showed the brothers my new and tightly-wrapped left hip. I could barely run, but I didn't feel pain.
Fans in attendance: Same as previous game, plus Randy.
Andy started and went one or two innings, then I got the ball. Andy had a shutout going and challenged me to do the same. I got through the first inning OK, but my arm was hurting again. I told Coach Scott that I would go until I walked two. I got two outs, then the pain got worse. I tried to get one more out, but walked the next two. I walked off the mound and into the dugout. I am D-U-N!
But we went on to win the game. We started and ended the week with a win!
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| It
is finished, finally! |
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| Friday night - Dinner at Dennis and Mary's. Geoff and Sue, and Randy make it for the evening. Lots of fun and drinks to be had. |
Saturday - Breakfast, then myself and Dennis drove to the stadium to clean out our lockers. I took Dennis home and we said goodbye to Sandra and Oscar, who were saddling up their giant van for the ride to their place in Camp Verde, Az. I then drove up to pick up Anf in No. Scottsdale. Gus, Maria, Dan, and George took off early that morning for the long drive home. As Anf and I pulled into the hotel garage, Glenn and Ricky were heading to the stadium to watch the championship game and awards.
June, Anf, and myself met Geoff and Sue downtown for coffee, then wine and snacks. I had a wonderful time chatting with Anthony about his early years after I had left the roost. Fascinating! I took Anthony to the airport about 3 pm, then the rest of us went out to dinner at Oregano's with the other campers and family.
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| Having
a long, catch-up afternoon with Anthony |
In an effort to prepare myself for hardball as an adult, I played in a local 55+ hardball league during the summer of 2017 (check it out). In hindsight, what Fantasy Camp lacked in quality of play, it MORE than made up for in QUANTITY of play. We played 7 games in 4 days. Each game was 6 innings or 2 hours, whichever comes first.
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| Ricky, the strongest, fastest,
and youngest of us, was an animal on the field. He played hard from the first game to the last, and apparently never got hurt. |
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| Glenn, the veteran camper, had described himself as the the worst player on his previous team. This year, he was a work horse in the outfield, running down long hits (sometimes covering two fields), and making ZERO errors! He got four hits and at least as many walks. Great job Glenn, and thanks for the inspiration to make this happen! |
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| Aside from the fact that we played a ridiculous amount of baseball, we ALL had a GREAT time, being kids again, playing baseball, and hanging out with my brothers and sister. |
in
the upper right corner of the pictures) On Sunday, June and I moved on to Palm Desert. Check it out.